Dance in the light of a lesson learned.

Bad things happen to us, good things happen to us, just the way it is. The same is true about people who come into your life, some you keep around and some you’re quick to let go of. Trust your judgement, hopefully you have things going your way more often than not, and you keep around the good folk who deserve to be in your life as a friend.

Now and again, someone comes along though who turns into something more. Somebody new is on your radar, you’ve noticed it and you start giving them some attention. Trust rears it’s head again, you dip your toe in the water if you’re sure that there might be something between you both, and if you’re lucky, that trust is mutual and perhaps something beautiful is just beginning.

Does it matter how long that something lasts? One night between two consenting adults can be mindblowing. It might just be random circumstance that brings you together but if you’re both single and want the same thing for that one night, then why not? Sure, there’s going to be more nights and days together with someone if you really like each other. You took the chance, they did too, now you’re sharing something together. What happens though if you misjudged yourself, what happens now?

Maybe when someone makes you a promise, they cross their fingers, hoping that they won’t let you down and think that makes everything okay. Just because something isn’t a lie does not mean that it isn’t deceptive. Perhaps the greatest distance between two people in any relationship is a misunderstanding about what the future holds. Not much else for it, the time has come to say goodbye.

Out into the unknown.

Aren’t most relationships onesided? Sometimes you’re the fish and sometimes you’re the fisherman, but when something ends it can still sting. It doesn’t matter who did and said what, the hurt will be real for a while but you get by, you move on. That said, is it okay to care for an ex, obviously not romantically, but as a person? They gave you happiness at some point in your past, so why should you hate them? We’re all different, so it’s fine if they don’t wish you the same. Maybe you don’t care what they think about you because you don’t think about them at all any more, you’ve moved on and a day comes when you’re happy again.

As soon as an ex sees you smiling though, isn’t that the moment they decide that they want you back? It can be a fucker of an emotional hot potato if they decide to get in touch again, what do you do?

One day a message arrives saying ‘I miss you’ from the girl who could have been an almost forever, a maybe forever, but she was definitely something. Was is the operative word. It’s okay to take a few days to think about what to respond with, if at all, but it’s nice to be polite. I know what those eight characters mean though, it’s just that the next person she replaced me with didn’t work out. When looking back at your history with someone and you know that they don’t do anything for you any more, you’re probably doing something right for yourself. If someone did something bad enough to make you have them not be in your life, you back your trust the second time not to be stupid enough to let them in again. Fool me once and all that. Getting with an ex would be like taking your driving test when you already have your licence. Pointless, stupid, a waste of time and effort.

Messages continue to follow and it’s clear that she wants something more than I’m ever going to give. It’s probably a dick move to reply at all but the replies are completely vanilla, hopefully the hint gets taken. Just because someone hurt you once, it doesn’t mean that hurting them back unnecessarily will do you good or make you feel better. The best idea is to probably try and forget the person who forgot about you, even if they tell you ‘I love you because I need you.’ What a shit and selfish phrase. I need you because I love you sounds infinitely better, doesn’t it?

You’re my ex. Ask me as many questions as you want but I no longer owe you any answers. Don’t worry if I’m with anyone else now or not, all you need to know is that it won’t ever be you. Everyone deserves to move on and find someone that makes them happy, good luck with everything to you, to all of us. We’re not enemies, not friends, now we’re just strangers with some memories.

It’s time for moving on, there’s some things you can’t forget.

@TheSamMcLeod

@YouMeMusicLife

Take my hand when you can’t see the light.

To many of us, the unknown is a scary thing, although it really doesn’t need to be. Think of all the good things that will happen to you and just enjoy waiting for them. You don’t know what all of them will be yet, but isn’t that a cool thing? Let your imagination go crazy, you never know, they could all come true. Sure, it’s confusing at times. Just maybe though you can find comfort in that confusion. A lot of feelings come into your world because of things being misconstrued or left unsaid. Confusion. A lot of the time, secrets and truths aren’t revealed in the words between two people.

The path to where we’re supposed to go isn’t always an easy one. We go down the wrong road sometimes. So, we get lost, we turn back, perhaps we turn back again. Maybe it doesn’t matter which road we leave on, maybe all that matters is that we leave? We can all be afraid to try but new things but we really shouldn’t. Trying this one thing that scared the shit out of me, led me to the rest of my life.

It’s oxymoronic but if you begin to understand who you are without trying to change yourself, then aren’t you changing anyway? Maybe life is about not knowing and taking chances when you can, because you have zero idea about what’s going to happen next. Isn’t part of the fun not knowing exactly what the fuck we’re supposed to be doing? Life.

Sometimes the things that we have to deal with on a daily basis can come from all of us not knowing our abilities, our frailties, our strengths, even ourselves. If a lot of us go almost all of the way through our lives as complete strangers to ourselves, then how can we possibly know anyone else? We can never really know another person, except other than our first glance at him or her, unless you continue down that road, should you decide to choose it. In that glance though, don’t we know everything? Maybe we’re not ready yet to work it out completely but hopefully one day we will. Maybe one person comes along and changes it all for you.

What if you lose them for a while?

Everyone has experienced some sort of heartbreak in their lifetime, no one is immune. Every story of not having someone around any more is different, but don’t we all understand that basic, gut wrenching emotion that comes from saying goodbye to someone that we love, especially when we don’t know when we’ll see that person again?

Men are often accused of being stubborn, of not knowing our own weaknesses. Fair comment, right? Isn’t it the same rationale then, that we also don’t know our own strengths? Maybe we can be strong enough to deal with that loss. There will be days though when you miss someone so much that you feel like your heart could explode. There have been days like that, a complete sense of feeling lost, of feeling like you can’t function without seeing or speaking to that special person in your life. We’re taught to always be humble. How can you be humble though when you’re swollen with pride? You can be happy and unhappy at the same time, can’t you? Sometimes a father’s tears are unseen but they are there.

Sometimes all that it takes is falling down to really know where you stand.

For those most special of people in your life, you want to be one who helps to build and nurture them in anyway that you can. You want to be someone who has an understanding for everything that they feel. Don’t all of us want to leave the people in our life better than when we found them? It’s simple, isn’t it? Just do your best to try and treat people with understanding. Sometimes you mess up but hopefully you can make it right again.

The happiest moment of my life was when she was born. It was also the most scary. To a father who is getting older in every second of every day, nothing is more dear than a daughter. Try and tell me that someone else in this world can love a girl more than her father. I dare you.

It’s the simple things sometimes. Taking her swimming and sliding down the water chutes with her because she was too scared to go it alone, having lunch with her when she orders a hot dog that’s the same size as her arm. Going shopping with her and silently cursing under my breath about how much it costs, whilst secretly loving it all at the same time. Trying to catch her before she falls. Picking her up, hugging her, telling her that it’ll be okay and then letting her try again. When she would tell me that she loved and needed me, she had no clue that I love and need her a million times more.

All I want is to make her tomorrow better than her today. That will never change. All I know is that my love knows no end. I want to be the light that she needs when her world goes dark. I want to be her living, breathing superhero. She might think sometimes that she’s on her own but she’s not. What she’ll always have standing behind her, is the love of her father. She might not know it but she’s had me wrapped around her finger since the day she was born. I don’t have her hand right now but you can be damn fucking sure that I have her back. Always, forever on your side.

@TheSamMcLeod